late night emails...

At home with the Spice Girls, but all of them gone except Mel B, who's been given the task (by the other girls) to make dinner and re-write a song in a different key (because this one doesn't feature the soprano-ness of Emma's voice). But there's a man there, also...one that needs a talk about self esteem and attitude, for some reason. As Mel is cooking (I'm not sure what it is at this point), she says to him,
"You know, when I quit drinking is when I got real crazy and out there."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah...and d'ya know why?"
"Hmm?"
"To lift my spirits, mate. But it's mostly just a defense mechanism."
(this term seems to come up in my vocab a lot lately)
Anyways, a few seconds into the convo, I slide my rolling chair over to the window because I see there's a traffic jam on the tiny country road that the house is on and there are water trucks with blue lights (umm snowplows?!) and sirens trying to pass everyone because a house 3 doors down is burning down.
Mel is just finishing off her spaghetti, mashed potatoes and peanut butter sandwiches for dinner (?!?!?!) when I jump to my feet because I all of a sudden think it's my brother's friend's house...and my brother is OVER there. I run outside and try to dial his number on my cellphone to find out if he's alive, swearing and crying as I try to get past the police tape in the burning house.
"Hello?"
"Where's Mike! This is my brother's cellphone, where is he?!"
"He's around here somewhere but he's being a jerk right now and not talking to any of us."
"I DON'T CARE IF HE'S A JERK; I CARE IF HE'S ALIVE! IS HE ALIVE?!"
"Yes he is...Jay's in the backyard waiting for him but he won't come outside."
(this is the moment when I realize that Jay's house is two houses further than the one that's burning down)
"WELL TELL HIM I SAID TO GET OUTSIDE AND BUNJEE JUMP, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!"
(?!?!?!)
I go over to the house, where Jay has a bunjee cord set up on the back of his porch and is trying to get Mike to go outside and try it but Mike's angry at Jay about something that happened earlier (I think it involved another bunjee jump). He comes out of the house and says,
"Jaq, I told you he doesn't have it hooked up properly."
He ties the chords to his feet and jumps - I hear a loud crack and Mike swearing. I move to a place where I can see him standing on the ground, 20 feet away from the railing holding the cord limp in his hand as it's still attached to the porch.
"He's got it set for 20 feet and it's only 7 feet to the ground, Jaq. I'm not going to do this anymore."

Then I woke up.
And realized that I just killed my brother in my dreams, now too. Twice in one dream, had he actually tried to bunjee jump head-first from a 7 foot high porch.

What drugs am I on?!